Saturday, March 11, 2006

It always amazes me, when I come back to my blog and take note of how long it's been since I signed in. When I started Cheesecloth Moon, I had hoped I'd be able to post something on a close to daily basis, mostly put out my poetry and match it to photos, if possible. I guess things have a way of getting left by the wayside when life intrudes.

I've been so busy lately, it seems like I never have time anymore to do the things I like to do. *sigh* I do a lot of sighing these days. I miss my poetry, but my brain is too loose right now to concentrate on it. I miss going out on my photography excursions, and poking around the arboretums, shores and beaches, and communing with nature. I miss lurking at PFFA, and reading my web buddies blogs. I've decided I don't like being grown up and taking care of business at all. There's no fun in it.

These days all I have time for is running to the nursing home or the hospital (btw, pops is back in the hospital for the 3rd time, same thing - kidney failure), or cleaning the basement or getting the upstairs ready, or taking care of mom's estate. The only thing I've kept up with is making the ATC cards - but I have to because I've signed up for a number of swaps. Besides, it's the only thing that's been keeping me sane these days.

And I'm always exhausted. I'm running on empty, and I've begun to fear that it's just a matter of time until I shut down and coast to the side of the highway, get stripped and rust away...

Well, I'm whining here, and I hate to whine, but that's how my life is right now. No fun, too much drudgery to take care of, no time for myself, ick ick ick ick ick.
I'm tired of it. I want to run away to a tropical island and never come back. But I can't. So it's buckle up and shut up and just get things done, and try to keep a glimmer of hope that better days are coming. I just hope they get here soon.

4 Comments:

Blogger Bluesky_Liz said...

Just dropping by. I hope things get better for you too.

3:00 AM  
Blogger David said...

The irony of keeping a journal. One wishes that one's life was more interesting, less mundane and banal,so that one has something good to write in one's journal.
But when one's life does become interesting, one has less,if any, time to write a journal, and one yearns for the good old days of the
mundane banality.

7:00 AM  
Blogger Rob Mackenzie said...

Sounds really hard going at the moment, Cookie. But I hope a few clear spaces open out for you soon.

5:38 PM  
Blogger Cookala said...

Thanks, guys. I really appreciate you stopping by and offering your encouragement and support. It helps so much. But I'm ok, and things are eventually going to get better, so not to worry. I guess this is just my time to go through trial by fire.

10:15 PM  

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